Japanese Dating Advice

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Hey guys and girls on Ask Japanese  greetings from sunny Tokyo  . now we often get questions about dating  Japanese people and today we’re gonna pick  . that up as a topic so our topic today  is love and dating habits of Japanese  . people so here are a couple of tips and  tricks to set you up for your next date. Now what girls look out for in a guy there are  three things that they generally look out for  . so let’s get a setup and help you  guys find out what these ones are  . Number one "ladies first" now the reason for ladies first being so popular here compared to maybe  . the western countries is because ladies first is  still kind of rare in Japan opening doors letting  . the girl enter first maybe holding open doors for  her similar things like that walking on the side  . of the road maybe pulling even back a chair all  this kind of gentleman behavior is not common in.

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Japan and because it’s not common it’s specially  appreciated by the Japanese girls because they’re  . not used to this treatment so if you’ve managed to do that for them you are doing well brownie points. Number two that Japanese girls look out for is decisiveness you’re going to a restaurant and you  . spent more than five minutes just staring at the menu not knowing what you do not good doesn’t show  . a strong conviction and decisiveness, number two you might be going to a amusement park and similar  . and you just can’t decide where to go you’re just  standing around for five minutes not knowing what  . to do again doesn’t show that you can like make  quick decisions and you’re confident in your  . decisions so decisiveness is actually something  that Japanese girls look for and that also leads.

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To being able to actually be in charge of the date  many Japanese girls are used to the guy completely  . planning out the day knowing where to go taking charge so yeah you need to be able to show that  . Number three cleanliness Japanese girls pay a lot of attention to how the partner looks and  . similar things like that so cleanliness called  Seiketskan is one of the most important things  . when you want to leave a good first impression  the first thing that might make you lose all  . your chances with a Japanese girl before  you even have said anything might be smell. Japanese people smell gently neutral there is  no BO you can be on a fully crowded train in  . summer and no one smells therefore you need to  really step up your smell game and make sure  . you’re always freshly cleansed and showered and also all kinds of smell are a nogo you smell.

Out of your mouth because you’re hungry, not on! You smell gently because you didn’t find  . a deodorant here that works in Japan also  you are out. So you thought you can maybe. mask your natural smell a little bit with  deodorant or some strong cologne also that is bad  . strong smelling smell so as perfumes and stuff are  also not cool imagine being on a crowded train and  . all you can smell is that one foreigner’s strong  eau du cologne it’s not good usually when someone  . has a strong smell on the train it is always the  foreigner and it’s not really really appreciated  . don’t be that one smelly foreigner. next one is  beard Santa Claus might be allowed to keep his. big fluffy beard but generally in Japan men are  cleanly shaven there isn’t even the wild boy kind  . of beard stubble that you see a lot in the western  world and definitely not at all the hipster beard.

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These ones are seen as uncleanly as someone who  isn’t cleansy enough who didn’t really shave  . properly and it has a very negative image here in  Japan sometimes foreigners can get away with it if  . they have a kind of wild boy or Brad Pit look  but if you want to be employed in Japan as well  . the beard has to go.. so being cleanly shaven every  day will not only give you better chances with the. ladies but also better chances to find a job in  Japan double win. and the next one is gonna be your. style now abroad you might be getting away just  wearing blue jeans and a tshirt and that’s it  . but you really need to step up your game because  in Japan Japanese boys especially those who go  . on a date are dressed really well Japanese girls  dress really really nice and kind of fashionable  . as well so you don’t really want to lose out and  if she spent two hours getting ready for the day.

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And you just kind of roll out with what you  were wearing in bed it’s not gonna look good. Next up splitting the bill so when you are  on a date sooner or later probably gonna  . go for a restaurant might be fancy Italian  or sushi or any kind of like kind of nice  . Japanese food or even western food that  you want to experience here in Japan right  . but who pays the bill? In some countries it’s a little battle of who pays the bill and you’re kind  . of supposed to do that in some countries it’s a  statement of equality if you both go half or even  . if the girl pays. Now in Japan that’s a little  bit different in Japan there’s a word called. "Otokogi or Otoko wo Miseru". "showing your manliness" and it’s often associated  with being able to pay something for someone else  . doesn’t even have to be a girl can also maybe  be your colleagues and similar things like that.

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"Manliness roar". On a date it’s kind of considered good manners  if the boy pays for the girl now the plus side  . to that one is for the girls that they get their  meal paid but the minus side is for the boys that  . they sometimes feel the pressure to pay the  meal every time and not just on special dates  . so it can kind of become pricy for them some Japanese girls might feel bad if you keep paying  . the bill for them but some kind of expect it so  maybe bring a bigger wallet when you go on a date  . Now if you go on several dates you might  be lucky and she’s okay with splitting the  . bill or maybe going to a cheaper restaurant  but there is one big exception: anniversaries  . Even if the girl says she doesn’t mind being  treated like a princess usually and it’s too  . much and whatever once it’s her anniversary or you guys’ anniversary you should kind of pay the bill.

For example her birthday your anniversary  30 days anniversary threemonth anniversary  . halfyear anniversary one year anniversary and so on of course with gender equality some changes  . are happening right now in Japan and some are  kind of still not but generally treating your  . partner with love and respect and making them  feel special is always the right way forward. Now while abroad where sometimes they tend to be the ones who don’t really clearly state  . our emotions and feelings in Japan it’s actually  important to do a certain type of love confession. For example generally after the third date or  on the third date you’re supposed to kind of  . tell that you like the person and you want  her officially to be your girlfriend these  . things are actually clearly stated here in  Japan it’s kind of important for the girls.

To know where they stand and they’re used to  that so be sure to state your intentions clearly  . and also if you don’t have the intention of  marrying them you should let that know as well  . because generally Japanese people date with  marriage in mind in the future so if you don’t  . have these intentions be honest with them  too. so everyone let’s go let’s ask Japanese. Sudden interview. Oh what why?. Today I am asking you about dating.. I hate that topic.. Who generally pays the bill in Japan? . The men generally pay the bill. Thanks. . I heard that often on the 3rd date you get officially asked out. . I heard that too . Let’s act this out here ok? . I thought about this but would you like to officially go out with me? OK. Yah I did it!. So these are a couple of Japanese dating tips but  as you can see everyone is different so it really.

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